Broken Dreams, 9x11" mixed media (collage and oil pastel)
Broken dreams are a fact of life. I've lived a blessed life - especially when compared to others who experience extreme circumstances, disabilities, illnesses, or fight to survive on a daily basis. And yet, I have known my share of broken dreams - some of which are passing disappointments and some of which have been life changing and require daily acknowledgment and management. These last few weeks, I've been dealing with the reality of living with broken dreams day by day. I suspect that all of us have those moments, and they are painful and hurtful and confusing.
What do you do with brokenness? It can so easily breed bitterness and cynicism, which are unpleasant (and unattractive) companions in life. But is is far easier to talk about letting go of those often legitimate feelings than it is to just do it! Even though I am a person of faith, one who is truly committed to my faith, I find no easy answers in the grittiness of daily life. The disappointments are real and they can't be waved away with some sort of magic wand.
I am learning to do this though -- I'm learning to give my small disappointments and my life changing broken dreams to Someone who knows my heart, who sees the span of my life, and who can take broken things and make them into a new thing. A better thing. I am learning that God's dreams are bigger than mine ~ and that he has deep concern and compassion for the things that touch and sometimes really pierce the core of my life.
He lets me give him the pieces though. He lets me put the little pieces of my hopes and dreams and expectations that are hardly recognizable anymore into his hands. He doesn't demand that I do so - he offers to take them from me. He also lets me put the pieces back in his hand, when I take them up again and hold them in my hands - often worrying, sometimes weeping. It's still a mystery to me what He will do with the broken dreams of my life. The end result will probably look nothing like my own vision of my life's dreams. I feel confident in this, though, His dream for me is to take the cuts and scars and pieces and make something new and better than I could have ever imagined. I'm waiting for the unveiling!
What do you do with brokenness? It can so easily breed bitterness and cynicism, which are unpleasant (and unattractive) companions in life. But is is far easier to talk about letting go of those often legitimate feelings than it is to just do it! Even though I am a person of faith, one who is truly committed to my faith, I find no easy answers in the grittiness of daily life. The disappointments are real and they can't be waved away with some sort of magic wand.
I am learning to do this though -- I'm learning to give my small disappointments and my life changing broken dreams to Someone who knows my heart, who sees the span of my life, and who can take broken things and make them into a new thing. A better thing. I am learning that God's dreams are bigger than mine ~ and that he has deep concern and compassion for the things that touch and sometimes really pierce the core of my life.
He lets me give him the pieces though. He lets me put the little pieces of my hopes and dreams and expectations that are hardly recognizable anymore into his hands. He doesn't demand that I do so - he offers to take them from me. He also lets me put the pieces back in his hand, when I take them up again and hold them in my hands - often worrying, sometimes weeping. It's still a mystery to me what He will do with the broken dreams of my life. The end result will probably look nothing like my own vision of my life's dreams. I feel confident in this, though, His dream for me is to take the cuts and scars and pieces and make something new and better than I could have ever imagined. I'm waiting for the unveiling!
5 comments:
Yes, something better emerges out of something which presently seems very painful. Secondly this will pass too. Happy moments as well as sad once are just transitory. That is the reality. That's why we say that time is a big healer.
Thanks for the prayer concerning my mother. I really appreciate all the prayers. It's been a long and painful experience, but I'm blessed to have a wonderful Christain mother who's unconditional love has been a great blessing in my life. Even though it's been a really horrible time, I can truly say it's also been a blessing to spend so much 'quality' time with her. Every once in a while we need to see what we're made of and where our strength comes from. You know God saves all our tears. They are very important to Him.
I will remember you in my prayers.
Take Care, Debbie
Helen, I believe that everything will align itself in order eventually for you - everything happens for a reason, and believe or not sometimes we do happen to be on the negative side of our life, even though we went by the book as a good citizen. You said: 'I am learning that God's dreams are bigger than mine ~ and that he has deep concern and compassion for the things that touch and sometimes really pierce the core of my life.' - Helen this is beautifully said, and very true. Love the painting too, however, the post itself takes over. Thanks for sharing, hope all will be well. Anna :)
Helen, you are such a fantastic writer as well as painter. Your post is beautiful ... the painting as well as the writing. I've had broken dreams, too, that ended up being mercies I found later. It is comforting to know that you don't have to have all of the answers, because you know the One who does. Sometimes the "only" evidence we see of God's love is the cross ... but so often on the other side of those trials, our faith is stronger. If this world were perfect, we would not long for a better place that we are guaranteed as believers. During times I have struggled with wanting something that was not in my life ... I literally CLUNG so Ps 84:11-12 "No good thing does God withhold from those whose walk is blameless (complete in Christ), blessed is the man who trusts in Thee." I just trusted that if it was a good thing for me to have in my life, He would not withhold that from me. It is so easy to focus on the thing we want so badly that it can become an idol. Anyway, your post and art is beautiful. Praying for God's comfort and peace for you that only He can give during this trial.
Thanks to each of you who left comments on this post. Your kind words are most appreciated!
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